At the start of this mornings group meditation I noted that we aren't meditating to try and change anything or to experience any altered states. It might be more appropriate to say that we meditate to remember who or what we really are. That sounds a bit odd, I'm me aren't I? What do you mnena to remember who I am?! The version of 'me' that I generally take myself to be is not the true, deepest version of me. It's a heavily constructed and strongly held story or character that both we, our parents, friends, history and so on have created. Just like David Bowie, we can actually change this idea of 'me' if we want to. In fact wellbeing sites and self help gurus are full of promises to help you find a 'happier, more efficient, better version of you'. That might be nice and all but in essence it is just tinkering with the outfit - we are dressing up in new clothes that we now believe ourself to be. But when the proverbial hits the fan, even this new version of you is unlikely to be immune from the very natural storminess of life - the illness, death, old age, divorces and million other tiny things that tend to derail us. These things are a struggle because they shake the foundation of who we think we are. This idea of Dan, Sue, Bob is suddenly very vulnerable. So rather than tinkering with the costume or the character, swapping it out for simply another delicate and vulnerable facade, what if we could identify with and inhabit something much deeper and 'solid'? Reconnect with the 'real' or true 'me'? What if this 'me' was ultimate and never changing. Not only that but it could never be changed, threatened or altered by any circumstances? It never got old or grew sick? This me isn't something new or an incredible experience, it has always been there, so plainly obvious in front of our noses that we entirely forget or overlook it. Because it was our first untainted version of self, before we knew our 'name' or any other thing about us - we simply missed it as it became obscured by the costume. You could say that it was our naked self, not in the physical sense, but stripped of all other labels and attachments. We can't look at this 'me', but we can very clearly feel it or sense it. What it feels like to just be, to just exist. And what is there to that existence? There is simply the knowing of being and all that constitutes being. This might be called God, the Tao, the present moment, or numerous other things but essentially it is just 'me', the feeling of me, the feeling I know or I am. It can take a while to realise that it is so simple. A bit of a journey to stop complicating things, trying to get 'there' by effort. But how hard can it be to inhabit what you already truly are? Try stopping and feeling it :) Comments are closed.
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AuthorDan Peppiatt. Archives
June 2024
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